SHORT STORY - THE LOVE BROKER
Joseph is a happy guy, in his late twenty's. A bachelor. Life couldn't offer him more pleasantries than he's already experiencing. Until that one day, when he meets Anna. He notices her for the first time in a coffee place. A mind blowing, beautiful girl.
Sipping from her cappuccino, she notices him too. She grands him a quick, lovely smile. Which is enough. He finds her utterly fantastic. From that point on, she keeps wandering his thoughts. He decides he will approach her the next time he sees her.
But every time he notices her, something goes wrong. Once, she's riding her bicycle on the other side of the street. When he tries to walk up to her, he almost gets hit by a car. When he looks up, she's gone.
The next time she 's in the company of what seems to be her mother.
Not a perfect moment for a chat.
The third time they bump into each other. She offers him again an enchanting smile. Joseph, who just spent a few hours at the dentist, looks like a halve sedated Japanese blowfish. His face is totally swollen up. He excuses himself.
So. No contact, no nothing. No Anna.
Joseph explains the subject to his friend Kasper, who laughs and gives him an advice. There is no such thing as a 'spontaneous encounter' anymore. Nowadays Cupid's matters are to be dealt with online: through a website called 'The love broker', where they function as a middle man within these 'come across crushes.' If you don't do this, every time something will ruin the moment and ultimately prevent a real connection between the two person and souls.
Joseph visits the website. He explains the situation to the girl during a video chat. She asks him if he has preferences: does he want a spontaneous encounter with this mysterious girl in
A. The morning, in the supermarket, where she will accidentally drop her groceries.
B. In the afternoon, in the zoo, where she will be watching the monkeys and mesmerise on her family- one of the monkeys and her favourite uncle have similar features and rituals.
C. The evening. The moment where they accidentally bump into each other while both being drunk.
Joseph imagines how he would feel about her after realising she looks a lot like the monkey formed uncle. The so called uncley.
He would be afraid the drunk encounter could go entirely wrong. Which has much to do with a former alcohol fuelled collision with a girl he fancied.
Joseph is a happy guy, in his late twenty's. A bachelor. Life couldn't offer him more pleasantries than he's already experiencing. Until that one day, when he meets Anna. He notices her for the first time in a coffee place. A mind blowing, beautiful girl.
Sipping from her cappuccino, she notices him too. She grands him a quick, lovely smile. Which is enough. He finds her utterly fantastic. From that point on, she keeps wandering his thoughts. He decides he will approach her the next time he sees her.
But every time he notices her, something goes wrong. Once, she's riding her bicycle on the other side of the street. When he tries to walk up to her, he almost gets hit by a car. When he looks up, she's gone.
The next time she 's in the company of what seems to be her mother.
Not a perfect moment for a chat.
The third time they bump into each other. She offers him again an enchanting smile. Joseph, who just spent a few hours at the dentist, looks like a halve sedated Japanese blowfish. His face is totally swollen up. He excuses himself.
So. No contact, no nothing. No Anna.
Joseph explains the subject to his friend Kasper, who laughs and gives him an advice. There is no such thing as a 'spontaneous encounter' anymore. Nowadays Cupid's matters are to be dealt with online: through a website called 'The love broker', where they function as a middle man within these 'come across crushes.' If you don't do this, every time something will ruin the moment and ultimately prevent a real connection between the two person and souls.
Joseph visits the website. He explains the situation to the girl during a video chat. She asks him if he has preferences: does he want a spontaneous encounter with this mysterious girl in
A. The morning, in the supermarket, where she will accidentally drop her groceries.
B. In the afternoon, in the zoo, where she will be watching the monkeys and mesmerise on her family- one of the monkeys and her favourite uncle have similar features and rituals.
C. The evening. The moment where they accidentally bump into each other while both being drunk.
Joseph imagines how he would feel about her after realising she looks a lot like the monkey formed uncle. The so called uncley.
He would be afraid the drunk encounter could go entirely wrong. Which has much to do with a former alcohol fuelled collision with a girl he fancied.
It's decided: groceries over monkeys over drunkness.
One week later Joseph rushes to work. He stops at a small supermarket for take away breakfast.
- TO BE CONTINUED
One week later Joseph rushes to work. He stops at a small supermarket for take away breakfast.
- TO BE CONTINUED
SHORT MOVIE - ORANGE PRESSED HERO
Alexander, not particularly a charismatic person, leads an ordinary life. He’s well aware of this fact. He has a mainstream telemarketing job, which evolves most of the time in a greyish office cubicle. He has one thing that makes life fulfilling: he ’s into a great and meaningful relationship with his girlfriend Ann. They care much about each other and spent a lot of time together.
Until that one special day.
While using his orange juice machine, to press cold orange juice, he notices something strange.
It’s an old one, the type of machinery that makes a lot of noise when it’s in use.
That one day, while pressing oranges, Alexander distinguishes another sound within the machine’s noise:
When he listens carefully, he notices that the machine is actually talking to him.
-We, the viewers can read the subtitles to understand what the machine is saying.-
Subtitle: Go to 65th & Johnson’s avenue at 22.05 o’ clock. An old lady woman is in danger.
He sits down in his couch in disbelief. Why bother, it’s totally non logic to listen to a orange press machine.
Alexander overcomes his primary sceptism - why favour the opinion of kitchen machinery? - and investigates the hints the machine gave him.
Alexander came to the stunning conclusion that an old lady was actually about to get mugged by a young kid. At 22.05. On 65th & Johnson's avenue. Which he manages to avoid. In the following weeks Alexander tips the police on robbery’s, prevents a huge fire, helps people who are trapped in an elevator for day’s and assists numerous other people who need assistance.
He ‘s constantly busy saving the world. He becomes a real, certified hero.
Including television interviews and a huge fanbase. We now see Alex being interviewed on CNN. In a wider angle we witness how this interview is broadcasted on tv. Ann, our new born hero's girlfriend is sitting on the couch, watching the show. It becomes clear: she’s lonely. Alexander is hardly ever at home.
Which makes Ann very sad. She misses the company of her husband dearly. She tries to explain. But our Alex has become a little arrogant and looses touch with his own self. One day he really manages to anger her with his selfish attitude. She’s fed up after being snapped at, by the man who she doesn’t even recognises any more.
In the following scene Alex comes home.
In total disbelief he finds a new, still in box, juice press machine. The old one gone. He finds out his girlfriend is in a very good mood. Fastly cut we see how our hero tries to buy orange press machines everywhere, from new to old ones. The old ones do talk to him. He obvious still hasn't lost his touch for talking to the press machines.
We see/ read in the subtitles how one machine talks about the early days. About a former owner. Another orange press advices our man just to go spent time on his girlfriend. So They all talk. But they don't tip him on future crime facts. Now we see our guy sitting in the movies with his girlfriend. She's a happy camper. He's back to being an average Joe, she's happy she's got her Joe back.
The End.
(We return with a short scene)
Some guy walks out of a store. He just bought a beard trimmer. In the next scene he’s having a shave in front of his bathroom mirror. Suddenly he notices something strange. Within the normal buzzing sound of his machine, he distinguishes something else… a voice…Subtitle: 'Quick! A murder is about to...'
Super: The End
Alexander, not particularly a charismatic person, leads an ordinary life. He’s well aware of this fact. He has a mainstream telemarketing job, which evolves most of the time in a greyish office cubicle. He has one thing that makes life fulfilling: he ’s into a great and meaningful relationship with his girlfriend Ann. They care much about each other and spent a lot of time together.
Until that one special day.
While using his orange juice machine, to press cold orange juice, he notices something strange.
It’s an old one, the type of machinery that makes a lot of noise when it’s in use.
That one day, while pressing oranges, Alexander distinguishes another sound within the machine’s noise:
When he listens carefully, he notices that the machine is actually talking to him.
-We, the viewers can read the subtitles to understand what the machine is saying.-
Subtitle: Go to 65th & Johnson’s avenue at 22.05 o’ clock. An old lady woman is in danger.
He sits down in his couch in disbelief. Why bother, it’s totally non logic to listen to a orange press machine.
Alexander overcomes his primary sceptism - why favour the opinion of kitchen machinery? - and investigates the hints the machine gave him.
Alexander came to the stunning conclusion that an old lady was actually about to get mugged by a young kid. At 22.05. On 65th & Johnson's avenue. Which he manages to avoid. In the following weeks Alexander tips the police on robbery’s, prevents a huge fire, helps people who are trapped in an elevator for day’s and assists numerous other people who need assistance.
He ‘s constantly busy saving the world. He becomes a real, certified hero.
Including television interviews and a huge fanbase. We now see Alex being interviewed on CNN. In a wider angle we witness how this interview is broadcasted on tv. Ann, our new born hero's girlfriend is sitting on the couch, watching the show. It becomes clear: she’s lonely. Alexander is hardly ever at home.
Which makes Ann very sad. She misses the company of her husband dearly. She tries to explain. But our Alex has become a little arrogant and looses touch with his own self. One day he really manages to anger her with his selfish attitude. She’s fed up after being snapped at, by the man who she doesn’t even recognises any more.
In the following scene Alex comes home.
In total disbelief he finds a new, still in box, juice press machine. The old one gone. He finds out his girlfriend is in a very good mood. Fastly cut we see how our hero tries to buy orange press machines everywhere, from new to old ones. The old ones do talk to him. He obvious still hasn't lost his touch for talking to the press machines.
We see/ read in the subtitles how one machine talks about the early days. About a former owner. Another orange press advices our man just to go spent time on his girlfriend. So They all talk. But they don't tip him on future crime facts. Now we see our guy sitting in the movies with his girlfriend. She's a happy camper. He's back to being an average Joe, she's happy she's got her Joe back.
The End.
(We return with a short scene)
Some guy walks out of a store. He just bought a beard trimmer. In the next scene he’s having a shave in front of his bathroom mirror. Suddenly he notices something strange. Within the normal buzzing sound of his machine, he distinguishes something else… a voice…Subtitle: 'Quick! A murder is about to...'
Super: The End
In den beginne was Jasmijn nog een beginnend kind. Opstart-afterbaby. Die regelmatig naar een kinderdagverblijf ging. Om ook daar de dienst uit te maken.
‘Waarom zitten die mevrouwen hier’ vroeg ze, als we terugliepen van het kinderdagverblijf, langs de Ruysdaelkade, de lokale prostituees passerend. Het waren al dames op leeftijd. Jasmijn zwaaide vrolijk naar de oma-ogende mevrouw. Deze al wat gerimpelde zzp'eester had een dampend bord hutspot op schoot. Terwijl ze een hap nam zwaaide ze vriendelijk naar ons terug vanuit haar etalage. ‘Dat zijn ouwe-hoeren’. Legde ik uit. ‘Dat betekent kletsen. Als mensen een praatje willen maken kun je haar even inhuren.’
Het kinderdagverblijf brengt ook nadelen met zich mee. Zo moet je daar contact maken met ouders. Dat kon natuurlijk ook wel eens leuk zijn. Ik waardeerde het haastig uit- de- oogkas- kijkende gezelschap van de vader van Pedro bijvoorbeeld. Mijn dochter kon namelijk de ‘r’ nog niet uitspreken. Als Pedro’s vader langskwam riep ze gelijk de naam van haar vriendje, alsmaar opnieuw, achter elkaar. Hij beende dan snel door. Geen prater-type.
Zo was er ook de 1- jaarlijkse bijeenkomst van alle ouders, die in een kring prettig konden bespreken hoe het iedereen verging, hoe hun spruiten wel niet waren gegroeid, hoe schattig en hoe lief ze met elkaar speelden.
Niemand overigens die de olifant in de kamer durft te benoemen, namelijk dat al hun kinderen eruit zagen, - tijdelijk terugtrekkende haarlijn, de eerste keurige kleertjes - als hun blanke kalende makelaarvaders. Ik miste alleen nog een kinder-Vespa.
Gelukkig was er tijdens deze meeting ook de wat geitige moeder die met een kuchje de aandacht op zichzelf vestigde. Ze wilde het graag over een belangrijk onderwerp hebben. Ze zei er meteen bij dat ze het overigens ‘niet te groot wilde maken’.
Semi- zeker van haar zaak ontfrommelde ze een A4tje uit haar zak terwijl ze vertelde dat ze het onderwerp - ‘de bijnaam van het geslachtsdeel van de kinderen’ - even wilde bespreken.
Geitmoeder vertelde dat het namelijk prettig zou zijn als alle ouders dezelfde ‘bijnaampjes’ hadden voor de geslachtsdelen van de kinderen. Terwijl iedereen nog even een chromosoom doorschakelde om op gelijk denkniveau te komen en het onderwerp te bevatten begon een geslachtsnaammachine te ratelen. ‘Voor de meisjes zaten we’ (er zat idd een man naast haar, een specimen die zich al vanaf het begin van het onderwerp verstopte in zijn personal space) ‘te denken aan de volgende opties:
Mandarijntje.
Appeltje.
Frupsje
Perzikje
Poedeltje
Pantoffeltje.
Appeltje.
Frupsje
Perzikje
Poedeltje
Pantoffeltje.
Mopje
Kuikentje -Kut-
Kuikentje -Kut-
Ik onderbrak de verkleinwoordmittrailleur met een ferme ‘kut’. Knijpend met haar ogen, gefronste wenkbrauwen keek ze wat ontdaan op van haar zelfgetikte geslachtsalmanak. 'Kut,' herhaalde ik nogmaals. Ik boog het woord om naar een vraagteken. Mijn mimiek verraadde gespeelde twijfel, om haar natuurlijke autoriteit op het dit onderwerp niet meteen te willen ondermijnen. Ik was zelf ook in de war, ik kon het onderwerp nog maar moeilijk verdragen. Jasmijns moeder wierp me een ietwat nieuwsgierige -en terecht- bezorgde blik toe, zich afvragend wat na mijn toevoeging zou volgen. ’Misschien, het is maar een optie, maar we kunnen ook het experimentele woord ‘kut’ gebruiken?’ Mijn recalcitrante ondertoon wakkerde ook onvrede bij andere kringgenoten op. ‘Misschien dat we dit anders per mail een vervolg kunnen geven?,’ opperde een medewerkster. Die net als de rest besefte dat er ook nog een snikkel-lexicon, de synoniemenlijst voor de jongetjes bestond. De vrouw frommelde haar fruitmand op en knikte ongemakkelijk ‘ja’. Haar man keek, net als wij bijzonder opgelucht om zich heen. Iedereen haastte zich naar de geimproviseerde bar. Kinderdagverblijfalcohol. Die meer dan ooit haar bestaansrecht bevestigde.
THE MANIC MOTHER MONOLOGUES
Picking up my daughter from school represents a great joyish moment in life. It also confronts me with a problem. Everyday the same female-shaped person beaches the schoolyard. She is painfully infected with ‘MMM’, a.k.a. Manic Mother Monologues.
Meaning: her sole purpose is to impress her surroundings with boring monologues about her day-to day motherhood life. Making sure everybody knows she has a poignant, meaningful and busy life. Her loud boring monologues represent an mammoth sized annoyance during my perfect father-daughter moment.
I addressed the school to this problem. To make their work easier, i came up with a few solutions:
Idea 1. We obligate her to wear a special mask when entering schoolyard territory. This instrument contains technology that translates her unimportant loud chatter to beautiful music. So when she starts talking, everybody will hear Chopin's Nocturne in E flat Major.
The exterior of the mask can be a copy of her face, but we can also decide, as a group, that she chooses another appearance. Think of the physiognomy of Halle Barry, for instance.
Idea 2. We add a soundproof cage to the schoolyard. By making it transparent the MMM’r thinks she is still part of the group and belongs to the normal ones.
Despite my effort, the school gave me a very negative response, stating i ‘overreacted’, and that it wasn’t decided that ‘MMM’ is an official existing decease and that they didn’t appreciate my ‘solutions’. I will bring this up at class meeting. Hopefully i can bring some sense in this discussion.
Meaning: her sole purpose is to impress her surroundings with boring monologues about her day-to day motherhood life. Making sure everybody knows she has a poignant, meaningful and busy life. Her loud boring monologues represent an mammoth sized annoyance during my perfect father-daughter moment.
I addressed the school to this problem. To make their work easier, i came up with a few solutions:
Idea 1. We obligate her to wear a special mask when entering schoolyard territory. This instrument contains technology that translates her unimportant loud chatter to beautiful music. So when she starts talking, everybody will hear Chopin's Nocturne in E flat Major.
The exterior of the mask can be a copy of her face, but we can also decide, as a group, that she chooses another appearance. Think of the physiognomy of Halle Barry, for instance.
Idea 2. We add a soundproof cage to the schoolyard. By making it transparent the MMM’r thinks she is still part of the group and belongs to the normal ones.
Despite my effort, the school gave me a very negative response, stating i ‘overreacted’, and that it wasn’t decided that ‘MMM’ is an official existing decease and that they didn’t appreciate my ‘solutions’. I will bring this up at class meeting. Hopefully i can bring some sense in this discussion.
IDEA/ CONCEPT:
THE BOOK THEATRE.A GREAT PLACE TO READ A MOVIE TOGETHER
We live in a wifi-world where online distractions & a short attention spam - are you still reading this or checking your whatsapp or Facebook?- are our biggest enemy. By creating interesting projects that give everybody the chance to playfully experience the almost forgotten art of 'concentration' we can make a difference. First stop:
The Book Theatre. A concept that comes to life in existing movie theatres. The place where you stop reading from your little screen. And start wolfin' away words on a big screen. Reading, short stories together, en group. This can also be done by beaming short stories on white concrete walls in the city. Great place to read a movie together.
KINDERVERHAAL: NACHTHERRIE
De verlegen, achtjarige Freek leeft twee levens.
In z’n dromen, ’s nachts, zodra hij z’n ogen sluit, is hij een gevierd zanger/gitarist in een jongensband. Zodra hij slaapt, z’n ogen sluit, opent zich een wereld van faam, fans, een droommanager en droomvrienden.
Overdag is minder leuk. Hij heeft niet zoveel vrienden en hij mag geen muziekles van ‘zn ouders. Dat zou ten koste gaan van school. Daarom kan hij niet wachten tot het nacht is. Waar hij al bijna zo beroemd lijkt te worden als De Duuk. Een artiest waar iedereen het nog altijd over heeft, maar die op mysterieuze wijze is verdwenen.
Het liefste slaapt hij altijd. Hij doet ook vaak even een dutje tussendoor. Gelukkig voor Freek zingt hij in z’n slaap. Z ’n oudere broer hoort dat. Hij geeft hem als cadeau een gitaar en laat hem lessen volgen bij de oude buurman. Freek komt erachter dat de oude buurman de Duuk is. Deze vertelt hem dat hij nu veel rustiger slaapt sinds z’n leven overdag veel leuker is. Hij leert Tom gitaarspelen en zingen.
Ondertussen praten Tom en Duuk ook veel. Tom leert dat hij gewoon moet genieten van datgene dat hij leuk vindt: z’n muziek. Dat hij zich dan ook overdag veel beter voelt.
’s Nachts speelt Tom voor grote zalen tijdens droomconcerten. Overdag rommelt-tokkelt en probeert hij erop los.
Het gaat steeds beter. Totdat de pestkoppen hem weer in het vizier krijgen.
De Duuk organiseert samen met de broer van Tom stiekem een optreden op het zomerfeest op Tom’s school. Een groot succes.
Op dat moment maakt z’n leven een fantastische ommezwaai. ’s nachts geniet hij in z’n dromen van de dag. Hij herbeleeft de mooie prachtige bescheiden optredens en andere muzikale verpozingen. Over z’n nieuwe echte vrienden.
Tom heeft officieel z’n droomgitaar aan de wilgen gehangen.